We Are The Worst People Alive

There are few deaths horrible enough for what we deserve. You'll see.
July 21
  • <I unfortunately can't repeat it, but I said something really cool that led to this reaction>
  • Phil: buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh
  • Phil: fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuu
  • Phil: fufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufuufufuf
  • Me: \:D/
  • Me: Wheeeeee
July 15

<have you heard me mention that I hate Phil?>
Phil: i want to email these people and be like “your couch would look better if you hadn’t drawn numbers all over it”
Phil: now who is going to buy it?

July 10
  • <I really hate Phil sometimes>
  • Phil: headline: 'Obama meets with Pope Benedict for frank, constructive talks'
  • Phil: cool Obama had a hotdog with the pope and then talked about building stuff
July 7

Sorry its been so long. Dont worry, still have the worst brain around; to wit:

travyo: will never buy another VW.  I’ve owned a beetle, golf, & westie and loved every one but my wife’s ‘06 Passat has chronic issues.  Lame!

joeym: @travyo do you mean you have a stack of these http://bit.ly/ARZR6 in the trunk?

via twittard natch.

April 3
  • Someone: Girls are always talking about finding a soul mates...
  • Jake: Korean Sailors?
March 19

A while ago I sent this reply to an email in my inbox:

Dear xxxplosive_satchel87866,

When I first received your most recent email I was filled with delight for, not only am I president of the local ornithologist chapter, but also I took a trip to France in the first year of my marriage 30 years ago. What I remember most were the small birds flitting around Notre Dame playing amongst the tourists and Parisians alike.

However upon clicking on the link “Paris Swallows” I was entirely surprised at the video that loaded. I am afraid you have had a mix up in your address book. Please do correct it as I do not believe my heart can take any future videos in this genre.

Yours,

Horace “laser_scepter[420Blitzzz]” Whilmont

March 16
  • <A conversation about dentistry and dental visits between Phil and his girlfriend Beth>
  • Beth: Anyway, the last time I was under anesthesia...
  • Phil: What a minute what?! Since when are you getting with Russian girls? This changes everything!
March 10
http://veryserious.org/2009/03/review/the-watchmen#comment-17296

I think this is probably a good example of me at my worst.
March 6
  • Andy: <edited> and <edited> drives me nuts.
  • Jon: An inline 6 cyclinder 2.8 liter engine drives my nuts.
  • My homie Jon recently purchased a BMW is the thing. I wish there was an emoticon for <dies>. I guess there is "orz" which will have to do.
March 4
  • Phil: i get really worked up about things i don't like too but they're very specific things, you get more worked up over broad principles
  • Phil: not to say your concerns are more or less valid than mine
  • Phil: but i just noticed it
  • Joe: Like "don't sleep with the dude on the first date"?
  • Phil: Fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff
  • Phil: crying
  • Joe: booo yaaaaa