We Are The Worst People Alive

Jan 31

“I told Jake I felt like I was right next to the face of a Cliff, like
Mrs. Huxtable. Jake claimed he was closer to the edge and more about
to break than Bono in 1985.” — Phil

Oct 15

a discussion about poker, farm workers

• Phil: people who work in fields where they need to read people will always win
• Phil: i have played 4 times, first 3 times i won money, this time i got broken.
• me: you mean like in between picking strawberries?
• me: seems like an odd choice in mags
• Phil: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

Jul 21

• <I unfortunately can't repeat it, but I said something really cool that led to this reaction>
• Phil: buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh
• Phil: fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuu
• Phil: fufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufufuufufuf
• Me: \:D/
• Me: Wheeeeee

Jul 15

<have you heard me mention that I hate Phil?>
Phil: i want to email these people and be like “your couch would look better if you hadn’t drawn numbers all over it”
Phil: now who is going to buy it?

Jul 10

• <I really hate Phil sometimes>
• Phil: headline: 'Obama meets with Pope Benedict for frank, constructive talks'
• Phil: cool Obama had a hotdog with the pope and then talked about building stuff

Jul 07

Sorry its been so long. Dont worry, still have the worst brain around; to wit:

travyo: will never buy another VW.  I’ve owned a beetle, golf, & westie and loved every one but my wife’s ‘06 Passat has chronic issues.  Lame!

joeym: @travyo do you mean you have a stack of these http://bit.ly/ARZR6 in the trunk?

via twittard natch.

Apr 03

• Someone: Girls are always talking about finding a soul mates...
• Jake: Korean Sailors?

Mar 19

A while ago I sent this reply to an email in my inbox:

Dear xxxplosive_satchel87866,

When I first received your most recent email I was filled with delight for, not only am I president of the local ornithologist chapter, but also I took a trip to France in the first year of my marriage 30 years ago. What I remember most were the small birds flitting around Notre Dame playing amongst the tourists and Parisians alike.

However upon clicking on the link “Paris Swallows” I was entirely surprised at the video that loaded. I am afraid you have had a mix up in your address book. Please do correct it as I do not believe my heart can take any future videos in this genre.

Yours,

Horace “laser_scepter[420Blitzzz]” Whilmont

Mar 16

• <A conversation about dentistry and dental visits between Phil and his girlfriend Beth>
• Beth: Anyway, the last time I was under anesthesia...
• Phil: What a minute what?! Since when are you getting with Russian girls? This changes everything!

Mar 10

http://veryserious.org/2009/03/review/the-watchmen#comment-17296 -

I think this is probably a good example of me at my worst.